FIFTY-FOUR

"All right."  Jon rubbed his palms together and grinned as he hunched over the wide, colorful paper unfolded across the tabletop.  "So, what kinda cool stuff do ya think we can see today?"

Jacob let out a disapproving groan through his biscuit-stuffed mouth.  "Daaaaaad...."

Jon arched a brow at his son.  "Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Are we gonna get there today?"  Romeo piped up before sticking two jelly-smeared fingers in his mouth.

Cate swallowed a chuckle and raised her juice glass to hide her involuntary smirk.  They were only one day into the Great Bongiovi Family Road Trip and already Jon's boys were bored.

"To Florida?  Probably not."  Jon gave the boy a bright smile.  "But we'll stop somewhere else and do something fun.  There are all kinds of landmarks and historical places along the way."

"Uuuucccchhhh."  Jacob protested with a gurgling groan and an eye-roll.  "Dad, can't we just drive all the way to Disney World today?"

"It's a long way, Jake," Cate answered quietly, her amusement now under control.  "More than eight hundred miles."

"So?"

"That's about twelve hours, not counting breaks.  You sure you want to be in the car that long?"

Cate almost chuckled again at Jacob's scowl.  She knew it wasn't intended for her, but for his overly-enthusiastic father.

"I don't care."

Jon snorted.  "Sure.  You and your brother are gonna sit quietly in the back seat for twelve hours?  I don't think so."

"I will if you give me my Nintendo back."  Jacob fixed Jon with a stony look.

Cate couldn't hold in a soft snort of amusement.  Jake's tactic was blunt but brilliant.  He hadn't been at all happy when his father confiscated all electronic devices from his and Romeo's luggage, declaring this family vacation a "screen-free trip." 

Jon shook his head, grinning at his son's attempted extortion.  "Nice try.  But nope." 

"Aw, Dad!" Romeo chimed in, picking up on his brother's cue.  "Come on!  It's boring in the car!"

"How can it be boring?"  Jon turned his attention to his younger boy, his smile softening.  "You have all kinds of stuff to do!  Crayons, paper, coloring books... How about those travel games Cate got for you?  You guys can play checkers or Uno..."

"BO-Ring..." Jacob interjected, rolling his eyes before stuffing his mouth with the other half of his biscuit.

Jon shot a warning glare at his petulant son.  "Fine.  Then look out the window.  Watch the scenery.  Or, how about this?  Read a real book.  Not a comic book on a computer screen."

"Cate got to read on her iPad yesterday."  Romeo's rebuttal was a simple statement.

"Cate can do what she wants.  She's not the one with her nose in a video game every waking hour of every day.  Plus, she's a grown-up."  Jon's voice now carried a hint of exasperation, a warning note that his patience with this discussion was wearing thin.

"Yeah.  Your Dad doesn't get to tell me what to do."  Cate couldn't resist the barb.  She gave Romeo a little smirk before taking another sip of her orange juice.

Jon turned his gaze to his wife, his blue eyes narrowing.  "You wanna back me up here?"

Cate gave him a bright smile.  "I am.  You said no electronics, and I support your decision."  She knew Jon could hear the note of subtle sarcasm in her tone.  While she agreed that Jon's boys shouldn't spend the entire trip with their eyes glued to a screen, she also appreciated the value of the devices to keep the peace during the long drive from New Jersey to Florida.

"Then maybe you should put away your iPad too."  Jon arched a brow with his challenge.

Cate chuckled.  "Okay.  I will.  But when you want me to Google 'Turkey Butt Battlefield' or some other obscure historical marker we drive past... Well, I guess I can't."

Jon gave her a little nod, a silent "touche" to her sunnily-snarky reply.  But he wasn't going to let her off the hook.  "No, I guess not."

"Thank God," Jake muttered.  He looked down at his plate when Jon shot him another stern glare.

"We don't really have to stop at another museum, do we Dad?"  Romeo's query was less sullen than his brother's utterance, but carried the same message.

"You don't want to?"  Jon returned his attention to Romeo, his expression now registering mild bewilderment.  "Why not?  Didn't you think the stuff we saw yesterday was cool?"

Cate's smirk softened at the disappointment in her husband's tone.  He had been so excited yesterday when they stopped at Fort McHenry in Baltimore and later at the Marine Corps Museum in Quantico, Virginia.  Jacob and Romeo had gamely followed their father through the guided tours, doing their best to pay attention as Jon peppered the guides with eager questions.

Romeo shrugged and took another square of jelly from the little basket next to the biscuits.  "Yeah, I guess."  He picked at the foil seal, peeling it back and depositing the reddish lump on his plate.  "It was okay."

"Just okay?"  Jon's smile broadened, trying to encourage a more positive reaction from his son.  "Come on!  We saw the place where the Star Spangled Banner was written!  How cool was that?  And you liked climbing around the fort, right?"

Romeo shrugged again, poking at the jelly on his plate with a finger.  "Yeah, it was kinda neat."  Romeo picked up the jelly-square and popped it into his mouth. 

Cate snickered at Jon's involuntary cringe. 

"Jesus, Romey..." Jon sighed.  He shook his head, acknowledging the futility of a protest before gamely continuing his pitch.  "Okay, I know you liked the jeeps and helicopters and Marines stuff."

Romeo nodded, reaching for another packet of jelly.  "Yeah.  That was cool.  Especially the part where we got to try the obstacle course."

Cate quickly retrieved the jelly basket, moving it to the other end of the table, out of Romeo's reach.  The boy issued only a mild grunt of protest.

Jon looked at Jacob, who was silently crumbling a biscuit half onto his bread plate.  "How about you, Jake?  You thought the Marine Corps Museum was cool, right?"

Jacob shrugged.  "I guess."

"You guess?  You were there for three hours, Dude."

"Because you wouldn't stop taking pictures."

Cate bit back a snicker.  Jacob did have a point; Jon had been fully immersed in playing with his new camera during their tourist jaunts.  He had taken over a thousand photographs yesterday, thoroughly documenting the first day of their family vacation.

"Well, maybe we'll find someplace even cooler today.  We can stop, spend a couple hours looking around, then stay in another hotel tonight.  Tomorrow we can go on to Disney World."  Jon grinned, satisfied with his plan.

Romeo's shoulders slumped.  Beside him, Jacob let out another unhappy grumble.

"Do we have to, Dad?  Pleeeeease can we just drive all the way to Florida today?"  Romeo gave his father a pleading look.

Jon sighed and leaned back in his chair.  He reached up to run a hand through his sandy shag, then looked at Cate.  She gave him a sympathetic smile and returned his shrug.

"We can make it today, but it will be a long day."  Cate's observation was calm.  "It's about nine hours from Quantico to the Center in Georgia, and another three from there to Orlando."

"But on the interstate we should be able to  make good time, right?"  Jon's tone was resigned.

"With normal traffic, yes.  If we don't stop a bunch of times."

Jon looked down at his wrist, evaluating the dial on the silver band.  "It's already almost nine.  Twelve hours driving, plus stops... Shit.  We won't get there until almost midnight."

"Dad, please?"

Jon sighed again and looked up.  He pressed his lips together as he regarded Romeo's hopeful face. 

"Okay.  But we're only stopping for gas and food, so don't ask for anything else.  You pee when we gas up, otherwise you hold it."  Jon glanced sideways at Cate.  "That goes for you too."

She stuck out her tongue at him, eliciting a giggle from Romeo.

Jon turned his attention back to Romeo and Jacob.  "And still no video games."  His eyes narrowed as he pointed a finger at his sons.  "You guys want to drive that far in one day, you figure out how to amuse yourselves.  And NO fighting, NO whining."

Cate fought the urge to roll her eyes.  She knew Jon's warning was futile; the boys would be fine for several hours but ultimately they would get on each others' nerves.  She turned to look at her husband. 

Cate's blue eyes met Jon's and she could see he was thinking the same thing:  It's gonna be a LONG fucking day.

"Okay, folks.  Here we go!" 

Jon and Cate started at the motherly waitress' cheery voice.  Jon quickly yanked the map from the table, attempting to wrestle it back into its accordion-fold as Cate pushed aside strewn dishes, napkins, and flatware.  When the table top was reasonably arranged the waitress set down large plates filled with hearty breakfast fare.

"Can I have more gravy, please?" Romeo requested politely after the meals were all in place.

"Sure, honey.  I'll bring you 'round another dish."  The woman gave Romeo a warm smile.  "Anything else?"

Jon eyed Romeo's plate, already crowded with a large portion of gravy-topped biscuits.  He snorted softly as his youngest son grabbed two more biscuits from the fresh bread plate.  He reached for his coffee mug.

"Just more of this, thanks."  Jon raised his mug, indicating a refill.

"Decaf or regular, Hon?"

"Oh, definitely regular."  Jon gave Cate a wry grin.  "And keep it comin'."

 "Alrighty.  Anybody else need anything?"

"I think we're fine for now," Cate replied, giving the woman a warm smile.

"Be right back."  The waitress gave Romeo a little wink before bustling away.

Jon picked up a fork and used it to cut through his over-easy eggs.  He popped a forkful into his mouth and chewed, resting his forearms against the table as he looked across at his sons.  The corners of his mouth turned with amusement as he watched Romeo stack a tower of biscuit halves six-high on his plate and douse it with an entire dishful of country gravy.   Next to his brother, Jacob smeared four biscuit halves with grape jelly.

With his elbow, Jon nudged his wife.  He tipped his head at the two  plates.  "Well, at least they'll be in a carb-coma for the next four hours. That should get us through North Carolina."

Cate raised her juice glass in a toast.  "God Bless Cracker Barrel."

Jon picked up his coffee mug and tapped it against her glass.

*****

SIX HOURS LATER

"Quit it!"

"OW!  Stay on your own SIDE!"

"I AM!   YOU stay on YOUR side, you Butthole!"

"YOU'RE a Butthole!  BUTTHOLE!"

"HEY!"  Jon's bark put the argument on pause.  "That's enough!"

Cate glanced sideways from her magazine at her husband in the driver's seat.  Jon's jaw was tight, his eyes narrowed into a menacing glare at the rearview mirror, his forearms arms rigid and his knuckles white as he gripped the steering wheel.  Her mouth curved slightly as a tiny voice sing-songed in her mind. Told ya so....

"It's not my fault!  Romeo keeps trying to put his feet on me!"

"I am not!  I'm just sitting here!"

"With your stupid feet on the seat!  And on MY side of the seat!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"All RIGHT!"  Again Jon's bellow cut through the bickering.  "Romeo, get your feet off the seat!  Put 'em on the floor where they belong."

"But Dad!  That's not comfortable!"

"I don't care.  That's where they belong.  And YOU, Jake... watch your mouth."

"What?  I didn't do nothin'."

"Bullsh.... Yes you did.  You called your brother a 'butthole'."  Jon hastily self-corrected before he undermined his own edict.

"Well he IS one."

"You're BOTH being buttholes.  But you don't go around calling each other that."  Jon growled through gritted teeth.  "I'm the only person who gets to call you 'Butthole'."  Cate's giggle drew his attention sideways.  "Watch yourself, Woman, or I may call you one."

Cate calmly turned the page, her smirk fully-formed.  "Go right ahead.  See where it gets you."

"Why are we going so sloooooooow?"  Romeo's whine from the backseat pre-empted Jon's snarky reply.

Jon growled before answering.  His scowl deepened as he fixed his glare on the long line of cars ahead of them.  "Probably because somebody was stupid."

"Can't we just go around them?"

"No, Romeo.  We can't.  We have to just sit here, like all the rest of these shmucks."  Jon shot a look sideways at Cate.  "Unless there's some other way you know about?  Back roads or something?"

Cate shook her head.  "Not really, without going way out of our way.  Besides, there's not another exit off I-95 for miles."

"Great."  Jon sighed heavily and let his head fall back against the seat.

"Where are we, anyway?"  Jake asked in a half-mumble.

"Still in North Carolina."  Cate answered for Jon, her smirk softening.  She felt a twinge of pity for her husband.  So far this family vacation wasn't exactly going as he had envisioned.  That they had spent the past hour inching South on Interstate 95 in bumper-to-bumper traffic wasn't helping matters.

"How much longer 'til we get to Disney?"

Cate turned in her seat, looking back at her stepsons.  Their expressions were identically unenthusiastic. 

"A long time, Guys.  If we were going normal speed right now we'd still be about seven hours from Orlando."

Jake rolled his eyes and groaned.  "Uggggghhhhh.  That sucks."

"Jake..."  Jon sighed a pre-emptive language warning.

"You guys still sure you wanna drive all the way tonight?"  Cate looked at Romeo, then back to Jake.

"Yeah."  Jake nodded.  "I just want to get there."

"Yeah," Romeo echoed his brother.  "I just wish we could go fast."

"So do I," Jon growled from the front seat.

"Okay."  Cate shrugged and gave the boys a resigned little smile before turning in her seat to face front.  She looked again at Jon, then repeated her shrug.  "Hopefully once we get into South Carolina we'll start moving."

"At this rate it's gonna be another fucking hour just to get there."  Jon dropped his hands to his lap after once again applying the brake.  He turned his tired blue eyes to Cate's.  "I don't know if I can do another seven hours."

"I can drive for awhile if you want."  Cate gave her husband a sympathetic smile.  "Once we get past this bottleneck let's stop, take a break, then I'll take the wheel.  You can sleep."

Jon nodded and reached for Cate's hand.  " 'Kay.  But first we have to get through this shit.  Without those two..."  Jon tipped his head backwards, indicating his recalcitrant sons, "...killing each other first."

Cate arched a brow.  She glanced toward the back seat before dropping her voice to a murmur.  "Baby, you know there's a way..."

Jon cut her off with a curt shake of his head.  "Nope.  I cave now, we're done.  For the whole trip."

Cate chuckled softly and nodded her reluctant agreement.  Jon was right:  if he backed down on his 'no screens' rule now the remainder of their vacation would be tainted by electronic distraction.

"But you..."  Jon gave Cate's hand a squeeze.  "If you want to use your gadgets, fine by me."

She arched a brow at her husband before replying.  "Good.  Because I plan to plant my butt on a lounge chair by a pool and catch up on my reading.  Soon."

Jon chuckled and raised his free hand to the steering wheel as he let the Navigator roll forward another few feet.  "As long as your butt is in a bikini, I'm good with that."

Cate snorted at his comment.  Jon had added his favorite of her two-piece suits to her bag, decreeing that her more conservative tankinis were reserved only for waterslide action.  With a soft sigh Cate returned her attention to the magazine on her lap.  Another squeeze of Jon's hand around hers made her smile.

The car was quiet for a full two minutes before the silence was broken, not with a whine but with a question.

"Who's Pedro?"

Jon glanced in the rear-view mirror to see Romeo slumped against the seat, staring out the passenger-side window.

"What?"

Romeo turned his head to look at Jon's profile.  "Pedro.  Who is he?"

Jon's brow furrowed as he tried to comprehend his son's query.  "Pedro who?"

"I Dunno.  Who is he?"

Jon's brow crinkled more.  "What?"

"Look."  Romeo pointed to the window.  Jon's narrowed gaze followed the direction of Romeo's indication, scanning for a clue.  His eyes settled on a large roadside billboard that proclaimed  Pedro Sez:  Chili Today, Hot Tamale.  A cartoonish image of a Sombrero-wearing man enjoying a siesta accompanied the slogan.  Across the bottom of the board was scrawled South of the Border - 23 miles.

Jon read the slogan twice, then shrugged.  "It's just a billboard, Romey.  For some Mexican restaurant, I guess."

Cate looked up from her magazine at Jon's comment, her blue eyes wide with surprise.  "Mexican restaurant?"

Jon gave her a confused look, then nodded toward the billboard.  "Yeah.  See?  Ain't that what you make of it?"

Cate snorted out a laugh, shaking her head bemusedly.

"What?" 

"Jon, that's South of the Border."

"Yeah, I can see that.  So what?" 

Jon's confusion made Cate giggle again.  "Don't tell me you've never heard of South of the Border."

"Well... obviously not.  Why?  What is it?"

Cate turned on her hip to face him, then looked into the back seat.  She grinned at Romeo.  "Oh my Gosh.  I can't believe you guys don't know this."  She chuckled at the boy's confused expression, so similar to that of his father's.  "Well, then again, I guess you guys have never driven down this way before.  Have you?"

"We usually take Dad's plane."  Jake's reply was mildly snarky.  "It never gets stuck in traffic."

"Hey -- watch it," Jon warned.

"Do you know who Pedro is?" Romeo asked Cate, clearly impatient with her glee. 

"Sure. "  Cate nodded.  "Pedro is kind of like a ... uh... a mascot, I guess.  For this place called South of the Border."

"What, like Bob's Big Boy?"  Jacob offered his analogy.  "Is there some big statue of him outside the restaurant or something?"

Cate chuckled.  "Kind of.  But he's outside the bathrooms, not the restaurant.  Over by the gas station.  And the shops."

"Shops?"  Jon spoke up.  "What is this place?  Some kinda truck stop?"

"Kinda.  But bigger.  With a motel, and an amusement park, and a campground..."  She looked again at Jon and chuckled at his expression.  "Oh my God. I can't believe you've never heard of this place!  It's a landmark!"

Jon looked sideways at his grinning wife.  "Cate, when do I have time to drive up and down I-95?"

"When you and I left Georgia the first time.  Remember?  We drove to Jersey?"

"Yeah, but we didn't pass this place.  I woulda remembered."

Cate snorted.  "Actually, we did pass this place.  We just didn't stop."  A light flush tinted her cheeks as the happy memory flitted through her mind.  On that trip she and Jon had both been wrapped up in the excitement of beginning their lives together.  She didn't recall much of that drive either, other than being with him.

"Why not?" Romeo demanded.  "It sounds cool!"

Cate turned again to grin at the boy.  "It is cool.  I've stopped there a bunch of times.  They have mini-golf and rides and an arcade... and a reptile zoo."

"Cool!"  Jake forgot his sullenness.  "Can we stop?

"Yeah!  Can we?" 

Jon looked into the rearview mirror again as he guided the Navigator forward a few more feet.  "I dunno.  We still have a lot of road to cover."  His voice was skeptical.  "How far is this place?"

"Twenty-three miles," Romeo declared.  "It was on the sign."

"Christ, it may take us another hour to go twenty-three miles," Jon grumbled, again applying the brake.

Cate winked at Romeo before giving Jon a smile.  "Well then, we'll be ready for a break.  It's the first exit over the South Carolina border.  Hence the name."  She giggled when he gave her a skeptical look.  "Look, we can gas up, stretch our legs, get a snack, then get back on the road.  I'll drive."

"C'mon, Dad!  Please?"

"Yeah, Dad.  Can we stop?"

Jon's smile betrayed his grumpy tone.  "Oh, all right.  But I don't want to hear one more word of fighting or whining.  Got it?  All the way to Florida."

"Okay Dad!"  Romeo eagerly settled back into his seat and leaned toward his window.  "Maybe there are more signs!"

Cate snickered.  "Oh, I think you'll see a few more, Romey."  She knew from frequent trips up and down the East Coast that South of the Border signs were abundant along this thoroughfare.  They were more than advertisements; they were Southern landmarks.

"Cool!"  Romeo pressed his nose to the window.  "Drive faster, Dad!"

Jon sighed and shook his head as Cate giggled.

Fifty-five minutes and eleven billboards later the SUV crept toward Exit 1B.  Jacob and Romeo peered excitedly out the windows at the huge sombrero-topped tower and surrounding structures.  Their anticipation was palpable.

"They're like dogs," Jon quipped as he guided the vehicle onto the right shoulder of the highway.  "The second we let 'em out they're gonna run around and yap.  And probably pee on everything."  He snorted amusedly at his joke.

"Well, hopefully not pee on everything," Cate grinned.  "Just where they're supposed to."

"I wouldn't place bets."

Cate shifted in her seat as the SUV picked up speed, bypassing the still-snarled Southbound traffic as they headed for the exit ramp.  "Believe me, I'm ready to hit the bathroom too."  For the past torturously-slow ten miles her bladder had been in need of relief.

Jon grinned.  "Thought you said you could hold it?"

"I can.  But it's been three hours since we stopped.  I've been drinking water."  Cate gave him a fake-scowl.  "Besides, you know the side effects of my meds..." She broke off and glanced toward the rear seat, not wanting to continue in the boys' presence.

"I know, Baby.  I know."  Jon nodded, his voice softening.  He guided the SUV around a curve in the exit ramp.  His grin widened as he took in the spectacle of South of the Border, now fast approaching.  "Holy Shit!  Look at this place!"

"Cool!  The ferris wheel is going!"

"I wanna go see the Reptile Lagoon!"

"I wanna ride the Himalaya!"

"Whoa, whoa, WHOA!"  Jon interjected.  "We're not gonna have time to do all that stuff.  We're just doing a quick stop, stretching our legs, getting a bite to eat, then hitting the road.  We're not gonna get to Disney until the middle of the damned night as it is."

"Aww... okay."  Romeo agreed halfheartedly.  "But can we at least go look at the lizards?"

"We'll see.  Depends how much you and your brother fart around in the bathroom and all."

Cate chuckled, silently predicting they wouldn't leave the tourist stop for at least an hour.  That would probably be for the best; the boys needed to burn off some of their frustrated energy before they resumed their long trek.

"Jon, let's stop at the restrooms, then I'll take the car and gas up while you and the boys look around."  Cate looked at her husband with her suggestion.  "There are a couple places we can get food.  We can just park there, then take off after we've eaten."

Jon nodded as he turned the wheel, guiding the SUV into the plaza's entrance.  "Okay.  You know this place, I don't."

"Dad!  Look!  FIREWORKS!"

"NO!"  Cate and Jon shouted simultaneously.

After driving through the center of the massive complex Jon located the travel plaza bathrooms and pulled the SUV into a parking spot.  As agreed, after making the necessary visits to the toilet facilities Cate drove the Navigator to a nearby gas station and filled the tank as Jon and the boys wandered toward the nearby attractions.  When she completed her task, Cate moved the SUV to a parking spot near the Sombrero Restaurant and went in search of her husband and stepsons. 

She didn't have to go far, spotting the trio inside a nearby souvenir shop trying on hats and sunglasses.  When she approached Jon dropped an enormous, festively-adorned sombrero on her head before brushing a playful kiss across her lips.

"Dad, you need these!"  With a loud rattling noise Romeo held up a pair of gaudily-painted wooden maracas.

"Nah, I'm good,"  Jon laughed.  "I got a couple sets of those."

"But not cool ones like these!"

"Put 'em back." 

"So, what do you guys feel like eating?  The Mexican restaurant is right there," Cate pointed through the plate-glass window toward the adjacent building.  "Or there's a diner, or a chicken place..."

"Ice cream!"  Romeo proclaimed.

"No!"  Jon parroted Romeo's sing-songy request.  "Listen, you guys better eat up here, 'cause we're not stopping again tonight."

"Can we go to the fireworks store?"

Jon turned to look at his elder son.  "No!"  he repeated in the same voice he used to deny Romeo.

"How about the Reptile Lagoon?  Where is it?"  Romeo tossed the maracas back into a bin, accenting his question with a loud rattle.

"It's in another part of the park, Romeo," Cate replied.  "I don't think we'll have enough time to eat and do that."

"Nope, we won't have time.  Sorry, Buddy."  Jon reinforced Cate's comment.  "We gotta hit the road."

"But Dad!  There's a hotel!  Can't we just stay here tonight?" 

Jake's protest caused Jon's brow to lift.  He turned to fix his boy with a stern gaze.  "You were the one making all the big noise about wanting to get to Disney tonight.  About not wanting to stop at any stupid, boring places along the way."

Jake shrugged.  "I meant stupid boring history places.  This place is cool."

Romeo hopped up and down excitedly, reaching for his father's arm.  "Yeah, Dad!  Can we stay here tonight?  Pleeeease?"

"Guys, we don't have a reservation.  They probably don't even have rooms available."

Cate's snort made Jon pause and turn to look at her, his brow still arched.  "And what was that for?"

"Jon, it's a Tuesday night in April.  I'm pretty sure they have vacancy."

Jon tilted his head.  "Oh, and you want to stay here tonight?  In a roadside motel?"  His insinuation was clear.  The accommodations at South of the Border were clearly not of Ritz-Carlton caliber.

Cate shrugged, her blue eyes twinkling as she met his challenge.  "I've stayed in places way worse than this.  And you wanted this to be an All-American Family Road Trip, remember?"  She waved a hand toward the window.  "Well, this is an honest-to-God slice of good ol' Americana, right here."

Jon smirked bemusedly.  "Oh, so you want to spend a day of your vacation here?  With Pedro?"

"It's our vacation, not mine.  And sure.  Why not?"  Cate grinned back at her husband.

"DAD!  Pleeeeeease!??!?!?!"

Jon's gaze moved from his wife's smile to his sons' hopeful faces.  He sighed.  "Well, okay.  If they have rooms... I guess we can stay tonight.  Maybe tomorrow the traffic won't be so bad."

"YESSSS!"  Romeo fist-pumped and bounced excitedly, making his blue sombrero tilt on his sandy head.  "C'mon, Dad!  Let's go find Reptile Lagoon!"

"Alright, alright... settle down..." Jon laughed as Romeo tugged at his arm.  "First of all... let's get a room.  Then we gotta get our suitcases out of the car, all that stuff. Then we'll go look at the snakes and lizards and gators and crap... maybe while your StepMama takes a break from you Lunatics.  Okay?"

"Aw, Dad...."

Cate pulled the giant sombrero from her head and placed it back on the shelf.  She sighed and gave Jon a bemused smile.  "I'll take care of the room.  It'll be easier if it's just me, anyway.  Take the boys, go find some stuff, and I'll call you when I'm done."

"You sure?"

"Yes.  I'm sure."

Jon paused, then nodded.  He pointed at Cate as he addressed his sons.  "Listen, you two... You know how lucky you are to have a cool StepMama like you have?  To not only tell you about, but to let you stay overnight in a place like this?"

Jake nodded his shaggy head, a sheepish smile curving his mouth.  He looked up at his stepmother.  "Yeah.  Thanks... Mom."

Cate felt her eyes moisten when her gaze locked with Jake's and she saw the sincere affection there.  Involuntarily her hand moved to cover her heart as she marveled at just how much the boy resembled his father, right down to his soulful indigo eyes.

"Thanks Cate!"  Romeo's happy chirp made her heart squeeze again.  Cate raised her sparkling eyes to meet Jon's.  His understanding smile brought a lump to her throat.

"Thanks, Baby."

Cate nodded, quickly looking away before blinking and clearing her throat.  "You're welcome, guys."  Her voice came out in a husky rasp.  "Okay... I'm gonna go check us in."

"Let me know if you need me,"  Jon stepped forward and kissed Cate's cheek.  He lingered with his lips near her ear long enough to murmur a private message.  "Thanks, Mama."

Cate pulled back and nodded, then turned away.  She hurried out of the shop, her eyes again moistened with happy tears.  When she climbed into the SUV and shut the door she sat for a moment, taking a deep breath before softly repeating the word that had touched her heart.

"Mom."

After another deep breath and moment of happy reflection Cate roused herself.  She started the SUV and carefully backed it from its parking spot, then cruised the short distance to the Motor Inn office.  Still smiling, she strolled through the doors and up to the circa-1975 front desk. 

Cate was surprised when the clerk informed her the Motor Inn was near full occupancy for the evening and there were no suites available for rent.  The apologetic gentleman explained the situation with a wink and two simple words:  "Spring Break."  With an understanding nod and a chuckle Cate requested the best available room.  Within minutes she walked out of the office with the keys to a deluxe room near the indoor pool.

Cate moved the car around to the side parking lot, locating their assigned room with little difficulty.  Deciding to leave the bags in the Navigator until she inspected the quarters, she unlocked the door and swung it open.  Cate giggled out loud at the kitschy decor. 

Immediately inside the door was a tiny entry foyer, just big enough for a coat rack and a small table.  To the left was an arched doorway, the entry to the stucco-walled bedroom.  Two double beds sat side-by-side, covered by mauve Southwestern-print coverlets.  Over each bed hung gaudy Mexican-art prints; one of a matador in the ring and another of a flamenco dancer.  The nightstand between the beds held an ugly, carved lamp with a barrel shade.  Across from the beds a flat-screen television sat on a long oak dresser. 

Cate strolled through the bedroom, noticing a taupe easy chair tucked into a corner as she passed, to the two doors at the far end of the room.  Cate slid aside the mirrored door on one to find what she suspected; a small closet containing a tiny safe and two extra pillows stacked on a shelf.  Turning to the other door, she pushed it open and stepped inside the surprisingly large but shockingly ugly bathroom.

"Oh my," Cate clapped a hand over her mouth and laughed to herself, taking in the bathroom's decor. 

The floor was tiled in gray slate, and a triangular glass-doored shower stall took up one corner.  In the other corner sat an ancient-looking jacuzzi tub, formed of scratched black fiberglass with a white tile surround.  A matching black vanity and sink and a black toilet comprised the necessary fixtures. 

Most gaudily, the entire room was tiled in white with a black tile stripe around the walls, up to the midline.  Above that, the walls were mirrored to the ceiling, providing a 360-degree reflection of anyone standing in the room.   Standard white hotel towels and washcloths were stacked on a rack above the toilet.

Shaking her head and chuckling again, Cate backed out of the bathroom and pulled the door closed.  Satisfied that the room was clean, she retreated to the Navigator to retrieve her family's bags.  It took her two trips to move the suitcases and backpacks into the room, and another 20 minutes to unpack her and Jon's necessities.  When her tasks were complete, Cate sat on the edge of one of the beds and pulled out her phone.

"Hey, Baby.  Did ya get us a room?"

Jon's voice in her ear made her smile.  Cate chuckled as she cast her eyes about the rental.  "Oh yeah. I got us a Deluxe room."

"Sounds nice.  Do the boys have their own room?"

"Uh... no.  It's not a suite.  There weren't any of those available."

"Oh.  So this is... what?  Just a regular room with a kitchenette?"

Cate laughed at Jon's assumption.  He really did have a skewed sense of reality, especially when it came to travel accommodations.  "No.  It's just a regular room.  Two beds, a closet, a bathroom."

"Oh..... okay.  Yeah, okay.  That's fine.  It's just for one night."

"Yes.  Exactly."  Cate looked up at the matador print.  "It's just one night."

Jon picked up on her tone.  "Cate, is there something you're not telling me?"

"No." Cate grinned.  "It's just a room, Jon.  Nothing fancy.  What do you want me to say?"

"We can stay somewhere else if it's shitty.  Drive to Florence or something."

"Jon, it's fine.  It's clean, everything works.  I've already unpacked."

"Okay, then what's that I hear in your voice?"  Jon's amusement came through his question.  "Something's up."

Cate giggled.  "Okay.  Just... be prepared when you walk in.  It's not exactly... stylish."

"Oh.  It's ugly."

"Yep."

Jon's chortle made her smile soften.  "The Chuckleheads will probably dig it then, huh?"

"Oh, probably.  It's pretty spectacular."

"How about we come check it out?"

"Where are you?"  Cate stood and wandered toward the room's entry, where a large map of the South of the Border complex was posted on the back of the door.

"Fort Pedro.  But Jake and Romey wanna play mini-golf.  Come join us?"

"Sure.  Meet you there in about ten minutes, okay?"

"Okay.  What color ball you want?"

Cate chuckled amusedly.  "I don't care.  Whatever.  Pick one for me."

"As long as I don't get the blue ball."  Jon snickered with his dirty comment.

"This is a family vacation, Jon.  We're all under one roof, for tonight anyway.  You just may have to live with blue balls."

"Nah, I'm sure we can figure something out.  We'll slip 'em some Benadryl or something.  Or sneak out to the ice machine for a few minutes."

Cate laughed at her husband's rendezvous suggestions, then made her sarcastic reply.  "Gee, how can a Girl resist such a romantic proposition?"    

"I'm betting you can't."

"Yeah, well... let's just see how mini-golf goes first.  Just keep in mind, I'm a sore loser."

"We'll see about that."

"Yeah, Yeah.  I'm on my way."

"Okay.  Love you."

"Love you."

Cate shook her head, chuckling quietly as she dropped the phone.  She retreated into the bedroom and located her wallet and keys.  With one more glance at the matador, she departed.

*****

"Holy fuck.  You weren't kidding."

"I told ya."

Cate didn't have to turn see Jon's bewildered expression.  She could see his reflection.  From all sides.  She grinned.

"Jesus... this is just..."  Jon turned to find himself confronted by another reflection.  He shook his head as his eyes swept over the white tile and black fixtures.  He turned again, revolving slowly until he again faced the vanity.  "This is the ugliest fucking bathroom I've ever seen."  His lips split into a grin as he shook his head. "Looks like a lapdance room at a crappy strip club, with all these mirrors."

And it goes so well with the Southwest-slash-Mexican theme in the bedroom," Cate wisecracked.

"What the fuck....?"  Jon stepped over to the toilet and gazed into the mirrored wall.  He immediately noticed the reflected image of his posterior  "Why the fuck would I want to watch myself take a piss?  From behind?"

"Or from the side," Cate laughed.  "Eeewww."

"This is just... horrible.  Just... Wow."  Jon turned toward the door.  "Hey!  Romey, Jake!  C'mere! You gotta see this!"

"What?"  Romeo called from his place on the bed.  He and his brother had discovered the Cartoon Network on local cable.

"This bathroom.  You ain't gonna believe it."

Jake snorted.  "Dad, it's a bathroom.  What's the big deal?"

"Come see for yourself."

Jake rolled his eyes at his brother, then slowly followed him in climbing off the bed and shuffling to the bathroom door.   His expression turned to one of confusion when he spied the decor.

"Ummm... what's up with this?"

Jon chuckled at his son's reaction.  "Exactly.  Pretty hideous, huh?"

"Why are there mirrors everywhere?"

"No idea."

"It's weird," Romeo agreed.  He pointed at the ancient tub.  "What's that?"

"It's a jacuzzi tub."

"Cool!  Can I take a bath in it?"

Cate chuckled, cringing at the thought of what acts had likely transpired in that tub.  "I'm not sure that's a good idea, Romey.  It may not even work." 

"Awww..."

"We'll go to the pool.  You can get in the jacuzzi out there."  Jon gave Cate a wink, reading her thoughts.

"Can we go now?"  Jake asked, stepping out of the crowded room. 

"Now?  We just got back from dinner.  Aren't you full?" Jon looked from Jacob to Romeo.  "And aren't you supposed to wait an hour after you eat to swim?"

"No," Romeo answered, grinning.

"I'm not sure we should even let you in the pool, as much Mexican food as you just ate," Jon teased.  "Jesus, you'll probably propel yourself across the pool and back with all the beans you ate.  Fart-power."

Romeo giggled.  "Yeah, so?"

"Christ, you can make your own jacuzzi.  Just sit in the shallow end and let 'er rip."

Cate snorted.  "You should talk.  You ate more beans than they did.  And you know what that's gonna do to you later."

Jon gave his wife a leer.  "Yeah, but you get to enjoy it.  Three farting Bongiovis.  In one room.  ALL night."

Cate rolled her eyes.  "Fantastic.  I may sleep out by the pool."

"Dad, can we go to the pool now?  Please?"

Jon nodded at Romeo.  "Yeah, I guess so.  Go unpack your trunks and get changed.

"Okay." 

Jake started toward the dresser, then paused.  He turned around to look back at his father.  "Uh... where are we supposed to change?"

Jon shrugged.  "Right there, I guess."

"But Dad...." Jacob raised his eyebrows and tipped his head toward his Stepmother. 

"So?  You ain't got nothin' Cate hasn't seen."

"Dad!"

Recognizing Jacob's discomfort, Cate quickly intervened.  "Jake, you can change in the bathroom.  Or, if it's easier, I'll change in here and you boys can all change out there.  I won't come out until you're done."

"Oh... okay."  Jake shrugged. 

"Just let me get my stuff, okay?"  Cate slipped past Jon, giving him a quick "What the Hell were you thinking?" glare.  She wasn't any more comfortable with the idea of seeing Jon's boys naked than they were.

Jon chuckled softly and followed her out of the bathroom.  He watched while Cate retrieved her swimsuit and cover-up from a drawer, then prompted his sons again to find their trunks. 

"Okay, just let me know when you're done," Cate called out as she closed the bathroom door behind her.

"Alright, you Chuckleheads," Jon grinned, pulling open a drawer and picking out his trunks and a t-shirt.  "Hurry up.  We'll swim for an hour or two, then come back and hit the hay.  We still have a long way to drive tomorrow."  As he spoke he tugged his t-shirt over his head.

"Can we ride some of the rides again in the morning?"  Romeo asked. 

"Maybe.  We'll see how good you are tonight."  Jon unfastened and stripped off his blue jeans.  Kicking them aside, he quickly stepped into and tugged up his trunks.  He tied the string at the waist, then pulled on his clean t-shirt.

"Dad, I can't find my flip-flops.  I think they're still in the car."  Jacob was still digging through his bag, yet to undress.

"Didn't you put them in your suitcase?"

Jake looked up and shook his head.  "No.  Mom put all our swim stuff except our trunks in the beach bag.  With our towels and the Nerf football and stuff."

Jon frowned and looked around the room.  "I don't think Cate brought that in."  He moved over to the closet and slid aside the door for a quick check before stepping to the bathroom door.  He rapped his knuckles against the wood before calling out to her.

"Hey, Cate?  Is the beach bag still in the car?"

Her reply through the heavy door was muffled.  "Yeah."

"I'm gonna go get it.  It's got the towels and shit in it."

"Mmmkay."

Jon moved back across the room, to the chair where Cate had dropped her purse earlier.  He rummaged inside it, looking for the keys to the Navigator.  Frowning, he retraced his steps to the bathroom door.

"Where are the car keys?"  He waited, his ear to the door.

"Uhhh... oh.  Here."

Remembering Cate had earlier tucked the keys into the pocket of her jeans, Jon nodded.  He reached down to turn the knob to the bathroom door.  Pushing it open a bit, he stuck his head around the door.  He grinned at what he saw.

Cate had already partially disrobed; she was standing in the center of the bathroom clad only in her bra and panties, her t-shirt on the floor and her bikini and wrap resting on the vanity.  She held her blue jeans in-hand, fishing in a pocket for the keys to their SUV.

"Need some help?"  Jon gave Cate a little leer when she looked up at the sound of his voice.

She snorted.  "I got it, thanks."

"You sure do, Baby."  Jon let his eyes drop to the bare swell of her breasts, skimpily concealed by her brassiere.  He felt a twitch in his groin, something that mildly surprised him.  It had been awhile since he had experienced such a primitive reaction to something as simple as seeing his wife in her underwear. 

"Here."  Cate succeeded in freeing the key from the denim pocket and held it out to Jon.  He reached to take it from her fingers.

"Thanks.  I'll be back in a minute.  The boys are still changing."

"Okay."  Cate tossed her jeans to the floor and reached up to her breasts, ready to unclasp her bra.

"Oh, Baby?" 

Cate paused and looked up at Jon.  "Yeah?"

He winked.  "Nice rack."

Cate stared at him for a minute, then smirked.  With a flick of her fingers she opened the hook, freeing her breasts from the navy satin cups.  Her nipples contracted at the freedom, shrinking into hard, pebbled peaks.

Jon's lips pursed, then spread into a grin.  "You're killin' me, Baby," he murmured.  Again his groin tightened, a long-dormant sensation returning.

Cate arched a brow.  "Sorry."  Her smirk told him she wasn't.

Jon growled quietly. If he didn't walk away now he might have trouble walking at all.  That would be fun to explain to his boys. 

"Thanks."  Jon jingled the key on its ring, then stepped back and pulled the bathroom door shut.

When he turned around Jon paused, then sighed.  Romeo and Jacob were both seated, one on the end of each bed, their eyes glued to a cartoon image on the television. 

"Alright!  Enough with the stupid TV!"  Jon strode over to the nightstand, picked up the remote, and switched off the screen.  "Get your trunks on!  I'm going out to the car for the bag.  I'll be back in a minute."

"Okay."  Romeo rolled off the end of the bed, onto the floor. 

"Get up.  Get dressed."  Jon looked at Jacob, who was still sitting on the bed closest to the bathroom.  "You too.  Or we're not swimming at all."  Jon strode for the exit.  The door slammed shut behind him.

Jacob sighed, then slowly stood.  He trudged the few short steps to the closet, where he had left his swim trunks on top of his duffel bag, then back to the bed.  He sat on the corner and pulled his t-shirt up over his head.  When his face emerged from the neck-hole, the boy's gaze settled on an unexpected sight.

The bathroom door was partially open, leaving a gap of six inches between the frame and the door.  Beyond the portal the mirrored walls reflected an image no pre-teen boy could ignore.

Jake's eyes widened and his mouth fell open.  An electric surge bolted through him, leaving a tingle of warmth in its wake.  His lips curved as he realized his good fortune.

He stared at the illicit vision, his Stepmother's glorious, naked body displayed in the mirror.  He couldn't take it all in at once; his eyes raked eagerly over her form, his addled brain deciphering flashes of vivid images like snapshots.

... The faded, shield-shaped mark on one taut-skinned hip...  

... The dark mahogany strip of curls against creamy, private flesh....

... The luscious curve of globed muscle at the top of toned thigh...

... The glitter of a diamond stud at the dark center of a flat, ridged abdomen...  

... The thick ropes of auburn slithering across a familiar inked mark, then swept away...

... The tantalizing sway of round, firm orbs crowned with pebbled, dusky peaks...

"Jake?"

"Jacob Hurley!"